Stress

Good morning, God--

And thanks much for this new day that we have. Here in the early hours of the morning, the day is still full of promise and potential, depending on what I give to it. And I thank you for the fact that I'm here and alive and able to do so many things on a day like today.

I thank you for the potential changes coming up in our lives, too. You know just as well as I do how difficult things are going to be financially without some sort of significant change, and that change looks to be right around the corner for us--so thank you for that! Of course, it's still in the future and there's always the fear in the back of my mind that something won't work out as it should, but for that fear I have to keep my faith strong so that I don't end up actually inviting the calamity into my life!

Things are going pretty well, all in all, and I thank you for this time of relative comfort. We have our difficulties, of course, but we're getting through them well. We do have money issues, but again, the new plans that have come up will go very far towards helping us to cope with them. It's always fascinating to see how things change through no doing of our own--life has its way of throwing all sorts of different kinds of pitches that can catch us unaware and throw us into a completely new set of feelings and experiences that we never thought we'd be going through. While I'd like to keep them coming and keep on learning from them, there's a certain point at which a little less stress would be nice for a certain period. . . .

A reply:

Of course, you're welcome for the day. And thank you for thanking me--not too many people do so, relatively speaking.

Yes, you're under stress. And yes, you're learning from it. I know that certain periods of being free from stress are necessary, and you will get those--at least, from certain kinds of stress. But the kite can only fly because of the tension created by it fighting the wind to stay in place--think of me as a very strong string that you can hold on to while you're flying because you're fighting the wind. I'm the string and I'm the wind, and I'm also in you, so you can tap that resource within yourself to keep your faith strong.

It's good that you recognize that fearing disaster too strongly can court disaster, even invite it into your life. I would just say this: just because you have a fear of certain things happening doesn't mean that I'm going to punish you for having that fear. I don't see that as a lack of faith--I see that as a fear that's been instilled in you by a lifetime of experiences, and one of your goals in life is to learn how to deal with such fears. If you dwell too strongly on those fears, then you may start to behave in ways that will make the feared outcome inevitable, but that's not necessarily going to happen. Keep your faith strong, and you'll strengthen the chances of those fears not coming true.

Keep your spirit strong, for that's something that no one or situation can take from you. And it's that faith that will help you to act in ways that will invite positive situations and occurrences into your life.

Being Vulnerable

Good morning, God--

And thank you for this new day and this new week in my life. I hope that I'm able to make the most of all the gifts that you've given me, and that I'm able to give to others in positive ways this week.

It's astonishing that it's almost February already. Time seems to be going faster and faster the older I get--will a year seem like a month if I ever hit 90?

I'm kind of perplexed about how I feel right now. I feel extremely vulnerable and not very confident. It's not a good feeling. I know that much of it has to do with having a class to teach with no materials--that makes me feel that the students aren't getting the continuity and coherence that they need to be studying a language, and I feel responsible for that. I know that it's not my responsibility at all, but the feeling is still there. It makes me hyper-sensitive to any criticisms or negative reactions, and I don't like that feeling, either. So the next few months are going to be challenging, I think. I don't even want to look at the evaluations from last semester because I feel so vulnerable right now, even though I don't believe that there's any reason to fear seeing them. It's crazy. I guess it's good in a way that I'm placed in a situation in which I'm learning more about the triggers for my fears and vulnerable feelings, but it's not easy to go through, especially with no one to talk to about it.

So here I am, sharing it with you.

A reply:

And I'm glad that you've done so. As you well know, though, even more important than talking about something like this is actually listening to the reply. And I'm glad that you do listen.

You are vulnerable. Everyone is. People who live from their hearts and spirits are even more vulnerable than those who try to live from their logic and brains. The paradox, of course, is that that vulnerability is the very thing that makes you stronger if you live from your heart and spirit. A threat to you may make things difficult, but you have your spirit to fall back on; you have your faith to carry you through the difficult situations. You also understand where people are coming from when they criticize you or try to knock you down--such actions are coming from who they are as people, and you know that.

Feeling your vulnerability isn't necessarily the problem--the problem comes if you allow that feeling to control your actions or words. It's completely normal to feel fear if you walk into a burning building, but sometimes it's necessary to do just that. It's normal to feel trepidation when you confront a loved one about a serious problem, but the problem still must be faced. You don't want to read the evaluations because the students may make some harsh criticisms based on their very limited perspectives, yet you've been teaching for many years and your evaluations have consistently been quite high. What is it about the possibility of harsh evaluations now that makes it more difficult? Your teaching hasn't changed much, but it is your first semester back at college after many years of secondary school--and thus your first semester of evaluations written by students in a very, very long time.

You are vulnerable. Everyone is. Perhaps everyone can use a constant reminder of just how vulnerable everyone else is around you. You feel fear and trepidation, but you're not showing it to the people around you. Other people feel those same fears, yet they're not showing them to you. Let it be for you an important lesson about the people in your life so that you might treat them with dignity and respect, even when their actions may reflect more their hidden fears than their true thoughts or feelings. Perhaps this feeling is a lesson in compassion.

New

Good morning, God, and thank you for this new day and this new year in our lives!  It's been a couple of weeks since I last spoke with you here, though I hope that communication is open between us all the time, blog or no.  I've been working on a project that I just finished yesterday, so now I actually have some time to do something other than that project.

We've started a new year, as you well know.  Personally, I don't see it so much as a start as a continuation--we left 2015 and entered 2016, but we also just finished Thursday and started Friday, when all is said and done.  Life keeps on keeping on, and the new years just keep on coming, don't they?

On the other hand, I like the idea of a new start.  I like the metaphor of the new year being a book with empty pages that we're going to write our story on for the next 360-some days.  Somehow, having the idea of a new start in my mind helps me to get focused on certain things, and that focus helps me to accomplish things that I want to accomplish.

I suppose what I mostly want to say is thank you for the promise of the new year.  None of us knows if we're going to be around for the entire year, of course, but we have to start it as if we are.  We can't start the year hesitantly and hope for the best--we have to enter the year boldly and make our goals and do our best to do the things that we hope and dream we'll be able to do.  I'd like to ask your help with that.  I'm not good at stopping and asking for help when I start something, but I know that I don't have to stop and ask you every time for you to be there with me, helping me out.  So as this new year goes on and I start to take on different tasks and challenges, I hope that you'll be there with me to help me to do things according to your will, the will of love, as I make decisions and start projects and take on challenges.  Even if I don't physically stop and ask you at the time, I'll still have the same standing request for your help and guidance.  And I thank you in advance for being there.

A reply:

You're right--you don't have to ask me over and over again.  In fact, it's mentioned in the Bible that you actually shouldn't do so.  People have been wise for a very long time, and one of the indications of their wisdom was the recognition that I'm not petty.  I'm not going to say "Well, he didn't ask me in the right way, so I'm not going to help him at all."  If your heart is always with me and hoping to do things for the good of the world, then I'm with you.  Any of you, and it doesn't matter what religion your parents have taught you--if goodness and love are being spread, I'm there helping.  Remember that the motive is also important, because a kind act done with the motivation of receiving something in return is no longer a kind act--it's a form of barter.  And thank you for asking--keep me in mind and you'll also keep your motives pure.

A new year is a nice gift, though it's based on the concept of time, which isn't nearly as important as many other things.  Love is a good example.  A new start is fine, but many people want to keep doing the same things, even with a new start.  When they do that, they get the same results, of course, and then they start to feel negative about new starts.  They don't keep in mind that if they continue to act in the same ways, they're going to get similar results.  They want to change the results without changing the actions or the beliefs, and life just doesn't work that way.  So look at your new year as a chance for you to start acting in different ways, and you'll see some significant changes.  Look at it with the hope that it's going to bring you new results all on its own, and you'll be quite disappointed.  Some new results will indeed creep in, but they generally won't be of your doing.

So enjoy the year. It is a gift, and it is for you. Make the most of it by making some of the changes that you've been longing to make.  Take risks.  Do things differently.  Meet new people and give new gifts and share new ideas and act in new and positive ways.  Think about it--if I were to give you a new canvas to paint on, would you use old paint that has faded and dried out, or would you use new paint with brilliant colors and high quality?  Yes, buying the new paint is a risk that you'd have to take, and the picture may not turn out exactly as you envisioned it, but the risk is worthwhile, for that is how you grow in life!

Coming up on the end

Good morning, God, and thank you much for this new day. We've had quite a bit of snow this week, and the world outside is quite pretty--and cold! It's appropriate, of course, for the season in which we find ourselves. It's almost Christmas, and the snow and the cold help to make the season seem even more Christmasy--to me, anyway.

Now that the end of the year is almost upon us, I find that I'm not quite sure how I feel about the year that's just gone by. It's been a challenging year in many ways, and strangely unfulfilling in many ways. I published a novel, but I don't have any marketing or sales success. I've started a new job, but while I've felt good about teaching the class, now that I'm back at the university, I'm back to having much less of an idea of who my students are, what they need, and how to help them. While I obviously don't want to dwell in the past, it is important to take lessons from what has gone by in order to do things better in the future, isn't it?

These landmarks of our lives--new years, birthdays, graduations, moving, etc.--can help us to keep focused, I suppose. They can help us to reflect upon what we're doing and how we're doing it. But I also know that if we're living life day by day, then we have to be focused on this day right here, right now, not dwelling on the past or thinking about the future. So when something like this changing of the year comes along, I do have to wonder just how much I should be focused on reflection. The year just gone by has been positive for the most part, but with significant negative elements added in. Can pondering these things really help me with the next year of my life, or would it be better for me to simply focus on the present moment and keep on keeping on.

A reply:

It's an interesting balance, is it not? From one side you hear "stay focused on the moment," while someone from a different direction is telling you that it's important to reflect on what has gone and what's to come if you want to live life fully. Still another side might tell you to just do as you're told and don't worry about things that aren't what you're supposed to be worrying about, while another will tell you to accept all things that come your way without worrying about what they mean or how they affect your life. Perspective--it's a wonderful thing.

There are certainly drawbacks to thinking too much about what has been. Yes, you can avoid future problems if you're able to identify causes and effects, and avoid the particular causes in the future. You can pacify yourself and make yourself feel better if you reflect on something and realize that you did the best you could, even if the outcome wasn't what you hoped it would be.

But remember something very important: all of these so-called "landmarks" are artificial, created by human beings in order to bring some order to an existence that they saw as unordered. Does time even exist, if we consider it subject to certain rules that can prove existence? What is a birthday but a designation that on this day, something happened. If there were no calendars, would there be birthdays? Would there be a New Year? Absolutely not.

You're a part of a race that feels a bit lost if it loses its methods of measurement, especially where time is concerned. You depend on your watches and calendars to give you a sense of place in time. Your home gives you a sense of place in space, but your watch gives you a sense of place in time. If you value that sense of place less than others, then your watch becomes less important to you. If you're comfortable with a higher level of uncertainty than other people are, then you won't need to feel that sense of place nearly as much as your fellow humans do.

That said, if you are able to function with a greater level of uncertainty, then you probably are a person who reflects on life and living on a regular basis, and there's a good chance that you don't need the artificial reminders of the passage of time to remind you to stop and take stock of where you are, what you're doing and what you've done, and perhaps even where you're going. And shouldn't that be a goal of life if you don't want to be centered in the material world--to be centered on life and living and the passing of each moment rather than trying to think about an entire year near the end of December. Think of all that you have to consider if you wait--and how much you'll forget and miss.

Life is a process, not an end result. You live the process each day, each moment. All forms of measurement of these moments are artificial, and they sometimes lead to less effective decisions about how to lead your life ("Oh, that can wait until the end of the month" isn't always the best thing to say!).

I've given you moments. Lots of moments. My hope is that you'll fill them with positive, loving, and compassionate thoughts and actions. If you want to know how to do this, just ask!

People are dying

Good morning, God, and thank you for this new day of ours.  I hope that I'm able to make the most of it and turn it into a very special day.

I have a rather heavy heart today.  More people killed in a mass shooting, this time in Bakersfield.  All these people dead, for no reason.  I know that people are killed every day, all over the world, not just in the States, but it's starting to feel like our society is degrading into a horrible mess, where people don't just not love each other, but actually are starting to hate each other just because of their differences of opinion or different outlooks on life.  We live in a society where it's becoming increasingly common for people to try to solve disputes with weapons, rather than words or reconciliation.  There are so many good people here, yet so many who have reached a point at which they want to hurt and kill others.

Why does our society not see what's going on and make a concerted effort to change things?  We have millions of people who are hurting, but very few ways for them to find help.  We have people who want companionship, intimacy, love, friendship--but who are unable to achieve any of those things that they desire.  We have people who are so desperate for something that they see their only viable option as picking up a weapon and hurting others.  Can we do anything to stop this?

A reply:

Such is the human race.  As a race, you have allowed yourselves to be swayed more by fear than by reason or compassion; more by anger than by a sense of unity.  In fact, you actively deny your unity in order to feel more justified in being angry.

What your country is suffering through now is a symptom, not a disease.  The disease has been around forever, as long as humans have been around, and it will stay with you until your communities become loving, supportive entities based on love and compassion rather than on retail and power struggles.  You need to focus more on teaching people their value and teaching them of things like effective conflict resolution.  You need to teach them what you all have in common rather than focusing on your differences as most of you do now.  You need to teach young people how to be helpful rather than helpless, and how to relate to other people on equal footing rather than on limited and artificial social structures.  You need to teach people to be responsible not just for their own actions, but for the well-being of their fellow human beings.  I can tell you honestly that apart from the mental illnesses, most of the people who have killed would not have killed if they felt themselves a part of a loving, caring community where they had a lot of support and in which they felt good about themselves.

You are the most individualistic society in the world, and that's getting even more extreme.  Young people spend many hours in front of screens--computers, games, television, movies--alone, when they could be spending that time with friends or families, learning about social rules and learning how to get along with others.  If they were to spend time with others, they also would get more encouragement, and they would start to feel better about themselves and their place in this world.

This symptom is going to go away only when you start to teach your young people to get along with each other.  Only when you pull them away from screens and teach them to be a part of a community in which they can receive good as well as give it.  Only when you start to focus on cooperation rather than competition.  Only when you teach compassion rather than judgment.  Only when you stop your politicians from bad-mouthing each other and calling each other names, providing the worst kind of role models possible for our young people.

This can be fixed, but you must start with the people and their hearts, not with the symptoms.

Work and money

Good morning, God, and thanks for this new day!  We have three degrees below zero right now, but we have a warm place for shelter and warm clothes for protection against the cold, so we have much to be thankful for.

It looks like my work situation is changing significantly, and I want to thank you for that while at the same time expressing my fear, or discomfort I guess, about the resulting financial insecurity that will come with the change.  Of course, I need to bring in an income, but there's much less income guaranteed in some situations than in others.  My fear, of course, is not having enough money to keep going.  I'm working hard at what I do, of course, but that has never been a guarantee of anything in the past.

I guess my prayer, then, is that our needs continue to be met during a transition period that's anything but safe and secure.  I appreciate the work and opportunities that I have, of course, but I do still have responsibilities and obligations that must be met.  My prayer is that I am able to meet them while still being able to get the most out of life (and you know that my wants and needs are not extravagant).

A reply:

That shall be, just as you pray it.  You have fear now, but think back to other times when you've had fear--you've ended up not just surviving, but thriving.  No, you've never gotten rich, but you knew when you chose to become a teacher that such a thing wouldn't happen.  You've met your responsibilities for the most part, and when you haven't, it's been part of a larger plan that ended up working out for you, in ways that were better than they would have been otherwise.  You've foreclosed on a house, but what would have happened had you not foreclosed would have been much worse.  You've had other problems, but the alternatives to those problems would have been very drastic, indeed.

As change comes along, the main thing I would encourage you is to be active in making the changes, rather than simply sitting back and waiting for changes to come.  You have passions and you have likes and dislikes, and you should search out that work that allows you to work within the realms of your passions.  Don't just wait around for something to come up.  Make things happen.  You can do it, and your happiness and fulfillment are at stake.  Keep your faith in me and life--it will help you to make it through the times of doubt and anxiety.  You'll do fine.

Another new day

Good morning, God, and thank you for this new day--even if it is -2 degrees outside, it's still a beautiful day, and I still have much to be thankful for.

Thanksgiving has gone by already, and we're moving on to the Christmas season.  The sales that now define our Thanksgiving holiday have passed for the most part, though our obnoxious retail advertisers are trying to extend them all through the weekend, all the way to Monday, now.  It's such a shame that we've become so materialistic.

But all in all, things are going well.  I just wanted to say hello because I've done so little here in November.  While I have talked to you in other contexts, I do value talking to you in writing because it helps me to focus and clarify so well.  I thank you for this wonderful new day, for the gifts I have, and for the life I'm living.

A reply:

You're welcome.  Enjoy the day--that's what I made it for!